A man is judged by the company he keeps – abroad too!

A man is judged by the company he keeps

This saying has its ancient roots and harks back to J. W. Von Goethe, who wrote: "A man is judged by the company he keeps, and if I know what you concern yourself with, I will know what you will become".

This concept has been taken up and remodelled in more recent times by one of the greatest motivational authors of the 20th century, Jim Rohn, who mapped out a fundamental model of reality: "You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with".

Changing countries and moving to live abroad, you have had to construct a new social network: new friends, new work companions, new companies.
Who have you decided to have around you? By people used to complaining, by those who find it difficult to adapt to uses, customs and habits of the host country, who criticize its culture? Or by enthusiastic people, who live the new experience like an adventure, who push you to be curious, so that you commit yourself to learning the new language, who invite you to discover and experience local quirks?

Sometimes, in a context alien to your own, far from "home", you end up frequenting people who perhaps you would have not been with in your home country, chosen more by cultural and/or linguistic affinity than by character

The people who we frequent most have a determining influence on our experiences.

You will have noticed that there are people who you like to be with, who it is pleasant to talk to, who give you a positive feeling after being with them. In contrast, there are people who will overwhelm you and make you sad: after an exchange, they leave you exhausted and with a bitter taste in your mouth, you go back home full of negativity.

Our mental attitude, in fact, is shaped as the average of the convictions, of the values and behaviour patterns of the system to which we belong, especially characterized by the five people with whom we weave the assiduous or more intense ties with.

Ideas, convictions, opinions are not entirely ours, but to a large extent, they are also the result of our daily interactions.

You recently met new people and you're not sure if they can have a positive influence in your life ... so you need to ask yourself:

  • What behavioural patterns have I acquired since I am with this person?
  • What kind of thoughts have I developed?
  • What feelings has she conveyed to me? Trust, energy, security? Or rather fear, insecurity, pessimism ...?

Remember that you are the average of the 5 people who you are most with!

Read the articles on Expats and the world of Intercultural Mind

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